HINDI    SOAP    OPERA

It is a common experience of everybody that if you visit some of your friends or relatives unannounced in the evening, you may find them glued to the TV daily serial. Its TRP rating is rather high. According to study, the ladies in general are crazier about it. I’m an exception. During the broadcast of these serials which practically cover a major part of day and night, no other channels are allowed to be seen, be it news, budget, Olympic Games, World Cup, football, cricket or any other things. Initially I used to sit besides her reluctantly with a book or journal in my hand. Gradually I found there is a lot to learn from these episodes. The theme of most the soap operas are strikingly similar. In case you watch them for a few months, you will be in a position to write scripts or direct such serials. I like to enumerate a few common characteristics of these with my personal remark.

A.      STORY:

          Do you really need a story to go for TV production? It is twenty first century and you expect ready made entertainment. You have to work on a few sequences,…..such as Marriage, Court Scene, Funeral, Puja, Accidents etc… etc….Marriage scene has to be gorgeous with background Hindi songs and lots and lots of dancing. The court scene is usually on murder charge, but invariably the wrong person is caught. If the murderer is caught, the charge cannot be proved. I’ve attended many funerals in coloured trouser and shirt. Now I know for certain that one has to show bereavement in white overall only. Following the accident if there is a red dot over the bandage, then you are sure that the accident was severe Head Injury and the character may lose all his/her past memory. Puja is the time when many characters assemble to show their costumes & jewellery.

REMARK: The serials run for months and years. It is for the benefit of viewers that the story is made simple and repetitive. If you miss any portion for couple of weeks you will have opportunities to view the same scenes over and over again.

B.      AGE :

          The serials cover three to five generations. If  so many generations co exist, the eldest person has to be more than eighty to one hundred twenty years old in the least. It may not be always possible to find a lady of that age. Still in almost all serials, there is an elderly lady whom everyone calls Ba. For the rest of the artists age is universally uniform and democratic. It varies from twenty to thirty. Grandmas and grand daughters use the same make up and gorgeous costumes and vie each other as they would have done in a beauty contest or ramp show. For a non regular audience, it may be slightly confusing to spot the grand daughter and may confuse the grand mother as the one.

REMARK: I agree that it is more pleasing for the eyes to see a grand mother who looks twenty rather than seventy. The TRP rating with the male viewers will increase considerably in case some of the grandmothers are dressed in BIKINI. For the understanding of the public a decorated AGE TAB can be affixed so that they don’t make a mistake to differentiate between the grandma and grand daughter.

C.      BACKGROUND:

          The serials aim at capturing the heart of middle class audience. No wonder that most of them revolve round a big joint family. They are usually in business and fabulously rich. No monetary transaction is less than one hundred crore. They may become bank craft for a while but make up all the money in no time. There is one servant in the house catering to everyone’s needs. The ladies are extra efficient and finish cooking best of dishes in one minute attired in best of their costumes & make up.

REMARK: This is a futuristic theme of projecting ‘Shining India’ when all the families will float in money.

D.      CHARACTERS:       

          There is a central character, usually a woman. This role is highly sought after. All other characters are dispensable. Whenever there is a dispute between the producer and the actors/ actresses, they are shown as dead. They can reappear any time if the dispute is solved. Next to the central character, the villains are in high demand. Each serial have several characters with negative roles at a time. Their roles are powerful and juicy. If any actor or actress can be on the good side of producer or director, he/ she can be transformed overnight from an angelic character to the role of the villain, which is considered as bonus or vice versa. There is constant intrigue, envy, jealousy and heartburn amongst the different family members even to the extent of trying to murder.

REMARK: In the present materialistic world, the producer endeavours to caution us not to believe any one be it relatives or friends.

E:     TEMPO:

          You must be wondering that how a serial can run more than 200 episodes per year for several years. The credit goes entirely to the director. I’m just describing certain scenarios. Suppose a person is going to another city for some work, he bows down to all seniors (totaling more than ten) individually and take their blessings each of them taking his own time. The same ritual is repeated when he returns. If one is upstairs and someone calls for the person, he climbs down all the steps to reach ground floor at his own pace. Moreover, an old person or one with arthritis naturally will take longer time. When an unexpected person lands up, to create suspense he is not shown immediately. You are to gaze at his feet for couple of minutes, then the camera goes up to the knee and then climbs up further. When the whole body is visible it is the rear side. This is how you are in suspense for ten minutes unless you are asleep by then. You can find hundreds of directorial brilliance if you happen to see a few episodes.

REMARK: You may feel that the director is intentionally dragging the serial, but you have failed to see the naturalness of his sequences.

 F:    PATERNITY

          This is the puzzling of all. You are to have 200% IQ to understand the father-child pair. There are various types of children……..child by present husband, child before marriage, child by previous husband, step child, child after marriage but out of previous lover, exchanged child, child as an outcome of rape, adopted child etc ….etc….To add to your confusion, each person is married multiple times, at times with a near family member.

REMARK:           Viewing these serials will enhance your intelligence and power of observation. If you can make a QUIZ program with ‘PATERNITY’ as theme, it may surpass the TRP rating of ‘Kaun Banega Croropati?’ and ‘ Kya Aap Panchi Pass Se Tez Hai?’

Whatever is written above is my personal opinion without any prejudice or vengeance towards the producers of these serials or their audiences. In the end I would like to know from my Blogger Friends:

“WHO IS A GREATER FOOL ????????

THOSE WHO MAKE THESE SOAP OPERAS …..OR…

.THOSE WHO VIEW THESE ……!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Polite Way to Pee

Parents and teachers make all out efforts to impart good manners to young boys and girls. I remember the code we were taught while needing nature’s call to be relieved…………No 1 and No 2 or only raising one or two fingers. Some girl schools used the term chhoto baire(small outside) or boro baire(large outside). What I said is well known to all of you. What you don’t know is the genesis of these terms.

During one of her daily classes, a teacher trying to teach good manners, asked her students the following question:

"Michael, if you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?"

Michael said: "Just a minute I have to go pee."

The teacher responded by saying: "That would be rude and impolite.

What about you Sherman, how would you say it?"

Sherman said: "I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom. I'll be right back."

"That's better, but it's still not very nice to say the word bathroom at the dinner table.

And you, little Johnny, can you use your brain for once and show us your good manners?"

Johnny said "I would say: Darling, may I please be excused for a moment? I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I hope to introduce you to after dinner."

The teacher fainted  ..........

BRITISH RULE IN INDIA

Today I am going to write something controversial about ‘British Rule in India’. I know that many of my friends will not share my opinion. I can assure that there is no intention to offend anyone’s sentiment. It is purely my viewpoint. You are at liberty to express your opinion freely.

Every good event has also a darker side and vice versa. We are living in a world of wonderful scientific achievements to make our life more comfortable. There are cars, air conditioners, TVs, mobile phones, computers and other amenities which are at our disposal. On the negative side we have become more mechanical, stressful and materialistic. It is rare that we visit a neighbour purely for friendly conversation. Einstein’s theory of relativity opened the possibilities of obtaining enormous energy by breaking an atom. In stead of using the energy for peaceful development, we devised atom bombs and hydrogen bombs. The same can be said about bad occurrences also. Devastating flood brings endless misery, but the silt brought by flood results in bumper harvest next year. In case you recover from a serious illness like typhoid, you get a very good immunity against the disease.

Let me come to the main topic. India is one of the few countries having a continuous civilization dating over 4000 years. Nothing much of written history is available about Mahenjodaro-Harappa civilization, which was mostly Dravidian. The Arians came from outside, defeated the Dravidians and settled to live here. There were mingling and admixture between the two different tribes and a true Indian civilization evolved. The Muslims of different races, Sakh, Hun, Pathan, Mughal invaded India at different times. These kings settled down in India and made it their motherland. Although, there was some conversion to Islam, people lived together harmoniously

The British came to India primarily as traders. They planted divisiveness among people and became the ruler. In the Battle of Plassey on 1757, Robert Clive defeated the army of Nawab Shirajjodollah with only 500 British soldiers as against 50,000 Shiraj’s troops due to treachery of his Commander Mir Jaffar. They exploited India to the hilt. They took away raw materials at throwaway prices and sold the finished product at many times costlier. They sowed the seed of mistrust amongst Hindus and Muslims. Indians were treated like servants. ‘Dogs and Indians are not allowed’ was a common sign in many clubs, hotels and roads. Britishers considered themselves as masters. The treatment of Englishmen with freedom fighters was brutal to say the least. A visit to Port Blair Cellular jail will surely wet your eyes. Jalianwala Bagh massacre was another burning example of their barbarous behaviour. You can go on and on about the misdeeds of Britishers.

Despite all the atrocities, something good has emerged out of this British Rule. I shall enumerate some of them.

1.                GEOGRAPHICAL ENTITY OF INDIA.

From time immorial, India was not a single country. It is inhabited by diverse people having different languages, dresses, food habit, and social customs. The esoteric terms like ‘Unity in Diversity’ or ‘Different Flowers making a Bouquet’ are nice for lectures, but cannot be the binding force for integration.

King Ashok was the only king to rule over this vast land with authority during last 2500 years.

 Other great kings we mention for valour e.g. Prithiraj Chauhan, Harsavardhan, Samudragupta, Maharana Pratap Singh, were ruler of lands even smaller than a present Indian state. The only Emperor, who had a big empire after King Ashok was Aurangjev. Unfortunately, he also failed to conquer South India convincingly. After his demise, India again got fragmented to be ruled by various monarchs.

It is only during the British Rule, The geographical boundaries of India as a country was delineated. The map we call ‘Mother India’ was a gift of the British, albeit inadvertently. 

2.                INTRODUCTION OF WESTERN EDUCATION.

The Englishmen ruled this country by remote control. They did not have enough manpower to administer this vast piece of land. There was need of doctors to run hospitals, engineers to make roads, buildings and bridges, babus to run administration. As a result they started schools, colleges, medical and engineering colleges to facilitate their rule. The offshoot is introduction of modern education in India.

3.                ENGLISH LANGUAGE.

We have 23 national languages and hundreds of dialects in India. Still English has been retained as an alternative official language. English bonds people from all corners of India. It has allowed us to keep abreast with international development and scientific progress all over the world.

4.                SPIRIT OF DEMOCRACY.

English people are double faced. They behaved like lords in India, but in their homeland they cherished the principle of democracy. Most of our national leaders and freedom fighters were educated in UK. They imbibed a deep sense of democracy and visualized a free, independent, secular and caste free sovereign India.

5.                ALL INDIA SERVICES.

The introduction of All India Services in army, railways, judiciary, police and administration resulted in interaction between people of various states. Some people, at least, considered them as Indian first and not Bengali, Punjabi, Gujarati or Tamilian first. The cry ‘Son of the Soil’ by trade unionist and politicians causes great damage towards Indian unity.

CONCLUSION.

Britishers left India after giving the parting kick of dividing it into two countries India and Pakistan plus 540 odd princely states. In case they did not rule for 200 years …….who knows????..........India would not be ruled by 5000 big and small Rajas, Maharajas and Nawabs.

AFTER BRITISH WHO???????

POLITICIANS……BUSINESSMEN………MAFIAS…

…………..OR  POLITICAL MAFIAS !!!!!!!!!!!!.

Gregor Johann Mendel

(Born: 22 Jul 1822    Died: 06 Jan 1884)

Gregor Mendel, an Austrian monk of Augustus order, was a great biologist cum mathematician. He experimented with hybridization of different coloured varieties of Pea  Pod Plants and expounded the Laws of Heredity. It was all the more creditable because at that time there was no concept of chromosomes and genes. He achieved the feat by virtue of his astute power of observation and meticulous recording of his findings.

He read his paper, “Experiment of Plant Hybridization” at Natural History Society of Byro 0n 08 Feb and 08 Mar 1865 and subsequently published the same in the year 1866. It attracted very little attention from scientific world for thirty years till revived by Hugo de Vries, Carl Corren and Erich  von Tschermark during early twentieth century. Mendel’s unique observation stood the test of time. He is aptly called the Father of Modern Genetics.

Mendel’s Laws of Heredity

A.      Law of Dominance:

Each characteristic of an organism is dependent on a pair of genes (Mendel called Factors), called as alleles.

Alleles are different version of genes, located on the same chromosomal foci, that imparts the same characteristic. Alleles are responsible for variation of inherited character. The external ex-pression or Phenotype depends on the gene ex-pression whether it is Dominant, Recessive, Co-dominant or incompletely dominant.

e.g.    In ABO blood group system:

          Blood Group         Phenotype             Genotype

                   A                      A                     AA or AO

                   B                      B                     BB or BO

                   O                     O                     OO

                   AB                  AB                    AB

NB:     A and B are dominant alleles and are expressed..

           O is a recessive allele and hence not expressed.

B.      Law of Segregation  

(1)     An organism inherits one of the pair of alleles  from each parents. In case the two alleles are identical, they are called Homozygous or true breed. If they are different, they are called Heterozygous or hybrid.

e.g.    Female sex cell is XX or homozygous. She will transmit only X to her offsprings. Male sex cell is XY or heterozygous. He will transmit either X or Y to his offsprings. Thus contrary to common belief, the sex of the child is always dependent on the father and mother has no role to play.

(2)     One of the two alleles for a particular characteristic gets segregated during gametogenesis. In other words each gamete (sex cell i.e. sperm or ovum) contains half the number of chromosomes as compared to somatic cells.

Somatic cells have 46 chromosomes (22somatic pairs + XY), whereas gamete contains 23 chromosomes (22 + X or Y).It allows maternal and paternal alleles to be combined in the offsprings to ensure variation.

B.      Law of Independent Assortment:

Different traits of character are inherited independently. Inheritance of one pattern will not affect the inheritance pattern of another.

e.g. An offspring may inherit the paternal gene for his height, but maternal gene for his eye colour.

R U SMARTER THAN A 5TH GRADER

TODAY WE LEARN MATHEMATICS

The goal of this lesson is solving mathematical problems by applying what you learnt at school (provided you still remember it)

I give you a 3 digits and a resultand you must put all the signs necessary to restore the equality.

I give you an example. The remainder you solve by yourself.

      2          2          2    =    6

Solution:

      2    +    2    +    2    =    6

Easy! Isn’t it?

It is the same for the remainder.

1          1          1    =    6

      2          2          2    =    6

      3          3          3    =    6

      4          4          4    =    6

      5          5          5    =    6

      6          6          6    =    6

      7          7          7    =    6

      8          8          8    =    6

      9          9          9    =    6

What! Did you solve some? Not No 2^nd!! It was the example, I showed you already.

Another? Oh No 6^th……..Not very difficult!!!!!

      6          6          6    =    6

Solution:

      6    +    6    -     6    =    6

Hey, u r almost EINSTEIN!!!!!!!!

And the others?????

Do you want assistance?

Ah! ……..not; I forgot you are intelligent.

I think you’ve already solved the 3^rd.

      3          3          3    =    6

Solution:

      3    x    3    -     3    =    6

Perhaps the 5^th……..

      5          5          5    =    6

Solution:

      5    ÷    5    +    5    =    6

With alittle chance, possibly the 7^th……..

      7          7          7    =    6

Solution:

      7    -     7    ÷    7    =    6

Still some more to solve…….

Now let us see those ones, which are a little more complicated

The 4^th…………

4          4          4    =    6

Solution:

  ___    __      __

\/4  + \/4     +\/4      =    6

The 9^th…….

      9          9          9    =    6

Solution:

        __        __        __

\/9  x    \/9  -     \/9  =    6

And the 8^th………

      8          8          8    =    6

Solution:

      __         __        __

  ³ \/8   + ³\/8   + ³\/8   =    6

On this,I finish today’s class.

Ah,….not yet……I still remain to solve the 1^st one….

      1          1          1    =    6

Solution:

Well, I give you a track, but I must acknowledge that this one is muscular.

      1    +    1    +    1    =    6

No?

      1    +    1    +    1!   =    6

No?........Still not? You are not gifted in Maths,….eh!!

Factorial: The factorial of a number is obtained by multiplying all the previous natural numbers up to 1.

It is symbolized by the exclamation mark. e.g.

Factorial 6 (6!)=6 x 5 x 4 x 3 x 2 x 1= 720  

Solution:

      (1   +    1    +    1)! =    6      

Since 3! = 3 x 2 x 1 = 6

(HAVE U WORN DUNCE’S  CAP?)

Good, considering your performance, the next course will track the art of walking while chewing chewing gum.

EVERYONE NEEDS A CALENDER TO LOOK AT DATES AND DAYS FOR VARIOUS REASONS. I POSTED A HUNDRED YEAR CALENDER (1900-2000). THIS IS A SUPPLEMENT FOR THE YEAR 2000 - 2100.

100 YEAR CALENDER 2001  -  2100
1		5	11	-	22	28	33	39	-	50	56	61	67	-	78	84	89	95
11		6	12	17